It’s a secret tightly guarded so the child is able to explore their gender without any stereotypes or having to fit into the box of gender expectations.

MOST children benefit from learning what is expected of their genders in childhood so that they can do well in their genders as adults. To assume from birth that your child is NOT like most children, especially just because you weren't, is stupid. Acting on the assumption is self-indulgent, solipsistic bad parenting.

Non-typical kids show early enough on that their assigned gender isn't for them. Those kids need and deserve understanding, gender-affirming parents. But so do cis-het kids; for them, learning how to be a gendered adult is what parents are for.

Yikes.